Quote category: Funny


Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you, he really is an idiot.

Funny

Groucho Marx Permalink to Groucho Marx quote

You ought to get out of those wet clothes... and into a dry Martini.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

A hard man... is good to find.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

It's hard to be funny, when you have to be clean.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

It's not the men in my life that counts, it's the life in my men.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

To err is human, but it feels divine.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.

Funny

Mae West Permalink to Mae West quote

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.

ReligionBanksFunny

Woody Allen Permalink to Woody Allen quote

It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny. (Reaper Man)

DiscworldFunny

Terry Pratchett Permalink to Terry Pratchett quote